Saying Goodbye

      On September 7th we confirmed, with Prof. Erdogru's (er-dō-rü)  assistant, the dates for my consultations and surgery. We had just under one month to make all the necessary arrangements before leaving the country. I had already received my passport, but was still waiting on my husband's to arrive. There was so much to do in preparation for our trip to Turkey.

      Most important was our flights, this turned out to be a very long and frustrating process (12 hrs. to be exact) 6 hours the first day, and six the next. The issue being, the extra seat needed for traveling more comfortably made everything very complicated. We first tried to book our flights through a third party, in trying to keep the fares low. Nope, not happening, the extra seat must have a name, but you can not duplicate a name or make one up. After a couple of emails, and a couple of phone calls to customer service, and four hours of trying to make this kind of arrangement work, (all for a great price) it couldn't be done. On to plan B, only there was no plan B, our only option was to book directly through the airline, but fares are much higher going this route. We soon learned purchasing an extra seat online, directly from the airline, could not be done as well. We needed to call customer service, and talk with a live person for setting up this type of flight arrangement. Well long story short, 2 purchases and 2 cancellation's later we finally got someone on the phone that knew what they were doing. When she learned we had originally booked with the third party, and than later canceled the reservation, because of an extra seat that I needed for medical reasons, and that they were unable to assign to me, she was willing to help. She asked us for the flight numbers and she was able to get us the same flights for the same low fare. This was the one advantage of booking directly from customer service, the flight reservation was complete. I double checked to make sure all three seats were next to each other, she put me on hold so she could go back and check...seriously! What's the point of buying an extra seat if it's in some random place on the plane, and I am unable to utilize it. One more hour later she finally had our flights booked with all three seats together. Total cost for three round trip ticket to Istanbul Turkey, just under $3,000. Lesson learned, never buy an extra seat, especially when traveling internationally. If you have to, just be prepared for a very long process. Honestly though, we didn't feel like we were asking for something so out of the norm, surely, airlines have to deal with this fairly often, I didn't understand why this had to be so difficult. Very annoying!

     After purchasing our airline tickets the realization of this trip hit me, everything was final...this is really happening! I was overwhelmed with a deep sense of relief for the first time in months. I couldn't believe that I was heading down the road of end all, and that road was Turkey. We knew the news of this would cause a lot of questions and explaining among our family and friends, this is how my blog came to be. We needed a place to share my story and somewhere for our friends and family to stay updated as we traveled to the other side of the world for this first and only of its kind surgery.

     My husband got to work, for any of you that know my husband, he is the tech support for me and our kids, and anybody else who is in need. He knew in order for any of our laptops, iPad, nook, phone chargers, and curling iron (hey, that's important too) to work we would need converters. He made sure to get these ordered before we left so that we had them available when we arrived in Turkey.

      Now, on to everything on the home front. There was still a lot of preparation involved in making sure everything ran smoothly while away in Turkey. We worked for a couple of days on detailed calendars, to do list, contact info, medical releases, scheduling who would be where and at which house on what days, and which caregivers would be at our home on other days, notifying the children's teachers, getting them all haircuts, scheduling orthodontist appointment's for routine adjustments, and talking with the kids about what we needed and expected from them while we were away. I think the kids were pretty much set and were on board with our plan. I know they are in good hands. We are going to be away for 16 days, and I have five kids, this was going to take a village to help get everyone's needs taken care of. No worries though, I have great family, and great friends, and some of the most amazing neighbors, I didn't know it at first, but I already had my own personal village ready to step in and take over all of the responsibilities I was leaving behind. We are so blessed to be surrounded by such amazing people. I was overwhelmed by the out pouring of  how can we help, or I'd like to help with this or that. Thank you to all who have a helping hand in this journey of healing and recovery, without you this wouldn't have been possible.

     The night before leaving, my husband had arranged for our bishop to come by for a blessing. In the blessing, I was reminded of the promises that I had received in a previous blessing just over a year ago. Although I had not forgotten the words spoken to me that particular night, it was comforting to know those promises still hold true, and I know one day I will no longer have to carry this burden anymore.

     After a couple of short weeks, the 3rd of October was finally here. Tensions were running high, all of the hard work and planning that had led up to this day was just hours away from being implemented. The kids all knew this would be our last day together and some of them seemed a little anxious and overly emotional. So when grandma showed up, because she was the one staying the night with my kids and also taking us to the airport, my three year old quickly became sad. He said "you go to Turkey now?" with teary eyes, and a pouty lip. I didn't want to say what needed to be said, because I knew what would follow, I hesitantly replied "yes" and quickly tried to reassure him that grandma was going to stay with him while we were away and that everything will be okay. It was too late, the melt down had already began, he clung to me and cried "I don't want you to go" he screamed this over, and over...and over again. This got my twelve-year-old daughter's attention, she came to me with tears in her eyes and said, "are you leaving now?" Her tears really surprised me, I didn't expect this goodbye to be so difficult. Her tears than snowballed, my three year old started wailing louder, and now my seven and nine year old were joining in. I wasn't at all prepared for this, I had no idea this would be so hard on my kids. Me and my husband have left them before, it's not like this was the first time. I realized they must be nervous for us, we had never left for so long, and usually we are leaving on better terms than for a surgery, in a different country none the less. And well, let's face it, the last time I had surgery it turned their whole world up-side down and we are still trying to put those pieces back together. Now the guilt sets in, I can't help it, it's just there. I pray this is all worth it, because walking out the door that night was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.